crunchier:

HOLY SHIT IT ME

galaxys-princess:

hotwhiteguy:

guys someone did it

"no more picking cereal out of your marshmallows" 

  • iPhone user: I'm so excited to get the iPhone 6
  • Android user: Why do people with iPhones think they're so much better than everyone else
  • iPhone user: I just like this pho-
  • Android user: The Samsung Anus5000 had that screen *snort* like 2 years ago! *glomping noise* How are you enjoying 2012 you mindless sheeple?? *uses inhaler to suppress incoming asthma attack*
"I’m all jagged edges on a rusted
pair of scissors and you, you are
a canvas painted by Dali himself.
Don’t come too close, I’d never
forgive myself if I tore a hole in
your perfection."
a 365 poetry project entry // Haley Hendrick (via s-k-e-t-c-h-e-d)

annemarina:

are straight boys obligated to touch the top of every door frame??

burgerkid:

burgerkid:

burgerkid:

Who does a pharaoh talk to when he’s sad?

His mummy.

i lost 10 followers already

spermbanker:

u know when u cold n ur nipnops go hard. why my titty betray me

"I am coming to terms with the fact that loving someone requires a leap of faith, and that a soft landing is never guaranteed."
 Sarah DessenThis Lullaby (via feellng)